Raw vegan newbie chronicles #8

I ate cooked food. It’s funny because as I’m writing it I feel like I’ve committed a deadly sin.

I’m supposed to be on a 31 day fruit feast this month. I broke up with my boyfriend of almost two years on July 2nd and I’ve been soothing my sorrows with food. 

Today 7/12/17, is the only day I’ve eaten cooked food. Up until now I’ve been binging on avocados with olives and hearts of palm. 

I’m mad at myself for one, turning to food for comfort (I’ve been feeling very uncomfortable lately because I’m overeating), two I just did my very first water fast for nine days last month and I felt amazing (the mental clarity I gained from the fast is what led me to let go of a relationship that I haven’t been happy in for months).

Anyway, what’s done is done and I have the power to make better choices. I chose the raw vegan lifestyle not only for the physical benefits but for the mental benefits. I cope with life better on a raw food diet. I don’t sink into deep depressions like I used to. I like the simplicity of being raw and food not being a “thing “. 

I’m going to channel my emotions in a more positive way. I wrote this poem about my relationship.

No passion in our kiss 

I no longer see our future in your gaze 

I feel a wall of contention and not to mention we don’t talk, just text these days 

The magnetic energy that brought us together the polarity has now shifted and we repel each other emotionally 

The love switch has been turned off and now we are in the dark trying to feel our way through this relationship 

Refusing to seek help from vulnerability, we let pride and ego guide us out of the darkness only to lead us to confusion and heartache 

On opposing sides we are now enemies instead of allies still in the dark 

Hind sight comes and sheds some light that explains it all 

The outcome is the same when we play love like a game, half in because we’re afraid to fall 

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